What do we do when we’re upset? Sometimes we cry, sometimes we scream, or sometimes we just stay quiet. It’s okay to not be okay. It’s okay to be sad and cry. What’s not okay is harboring that. People tend to do that without even realizing it. We keep our feelings to ourselves because we don’t think anyone cares or anyone would listen. Maybe we do it because we think our problem is insignificant, but God cares about the small problems too. It’s good to talk about your feelings. It’s good to tell someone how you feel especially if it hurts you. So pray, talk to a close friend, and move on.
Pray Before Anything
Pray. God already knows your problems and your needs. He sees your hurt, He hears your cries, and He’s there in your loneliness. Sometimes we truly believe that God has abandoned us, but in reality we’ve abandoned God. We choose not to pray. We choose not to listen to Christian music. We choose not to give it all to God. We want a miracle, but we don’t pray or ask God for anything.
“But if you remain in me and in my words remain in you, you may ask for anything you want, and it will be granted!’ – John 15:7
If somebody hurt you or did something wrong by you, ask for forgiveness. Yes I said that correctly. YOU ask for forgiveness. We often hold grudges or bitterness to those that have done us wrong. Holding grudges against others hinders our spiritual growth. It’s hard to forgive people. Personally, I struggle with it. Once you forgive others, you’ll be able to move on. You can’t move forwards while you’re still having a pity party over something that the other person doesn’t even care about. Ask for forgiveness, and forgive others.
Give it to God. What does that phrase mean? I hear people say this all the time. We tell others just to “give it to God” when they’re hurting. We say it all the time, but do we really know what it means? Giving your problems to God is more than just saying that you give it all to Him. It’s living by it. It’s not worrying about what comes next because you know that God has you in His arms. It’s you trusting His will in your life. If you say you’re giving it to God, then live by it.
Talk to a Close Friend
You have to be careful with how you do this. There’s a fine line between getting things off your chest and gossiping. If someone hurt you and you gossip about them to someone, then you are just as bad as they are. Complaining about a person, telling someone things that they don’t need to know about another person, or spreading false rumors is gossiping. Be careful how you speak about another person. Sometimes we let our anger get out of control and we end up saying things we’ll regret. You never know if you and that person may become close, and everything you said about them comes back up to only separate you again. Don’t let anger and bitterness control you.
“A gossip goes around telling secrets, but those who are trustworthy can keep a confidence.” -Proverbs 11:13
“A troublemaker plants seeds of strife; gossip separates the best of friends.” -Proverbs 16:28
“And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry,” – Ephesians 4:26
Whenever I’m having a bad time or I don’t know what to do, I struggle with talking to people about how I feel. I thought nobody would listen nor even care. All I wanted was for someone to care, but what I needed was for myself to realize that people do. People do care about you. There’s always someone out there who loves you even if you don’t believe it. Reach out. Reach out to someone and talk about your feelings. People don’t always just know when you’re not okay. It’s hard to open up to someone, but afterwards you’ll feel a lot better. Just call or text a friend or someone in your church and ask them to pray for you. You could go into detail about your situation, or you could just simply ask them to pray for you. It’s that simple.
After you’ve prayed and talked to a friend, move on. God’s plan for you isn’t sitting around crying because something bad happened. His plan is to build and shape you into the man or woman of God that He wants you to be. You’re going to change people. You’re going to be apart of God’s kingdom. So act like it. You can’t minister to people while you’re focusing on yourself.
“Offer sacrifices in the right spirit, and trust the Lord.”
Only God can give you the closure to move on. In Him we can dive deeper into our spiritual lives. When we focus on the pain of the past, we can’t embrace the blessings in our future. We can’t have the right relationship with Him while we’re crossing our arms because of something that happened in the past.
Here’s something I try to live by:
Cry about it. Sit around for a minute and just cry. That’s okay. Don’t stay there. Get up and move on with your life. You aren’t built to break over this. You were made to overcome. Pray for strength. Pray for wisdom. Pray for His will, then overcome.